This message is for 21+. By continuing to read, you agree that you are 21 years or older.
In our day to day lives, it can get pretty busy and we often lose sight of what is really important. I also think as moms, we tend to put everyone else in our family first. This is especially true if you are taking care of someone who has special needs, no matter how old that person is or what their needs are.
I have found myself taking care of people in my family that had a need to have someone help them navigate waters that were unsteady a couple of times. This was a unique place to find myself in as I was once that person who needed extra help. Taking care of someone who has a condition that requires 24/7 care can easily make a person forget to do self-care which is so important. I learned that after I almost crashed and burned. I had to pick myself up and put myself first, which for more, is extremely hard since I tend to be a caretaker. I have a hard time being selfish when I need to.
Since I have my own health condition as well as a tendency towards depression and anxiety, and had worked so hard in therapy to find strength to become more stable, I was really taken back by how easy it was for me to fall back again. This not only was hard for me to admit, but also hard for me to find my way out. Over the winter, I found myself in a position of really needing to take a different path and that path was more self-care. I needed to prioritize myself. I was starting to become ill from stress and feeling trapped as well as forgetting who I was.
Put On Your Own Mask First
Think about it for a minute. Have you ever flown? At the beginning, the flight attendants give you a speech and demonstration on what to do in case of an emergency. If you are paying attention, you probably have heard them say to put your own oxygen mask on BEFORE you try to help others with theirs. The reason being is, how much good are you passed out and unable to breathe yourself to the person you are trying to help? I like to use the as a reminder to myself that it is not selfish to make time for myself. In fact, it is necessary.
I bet you are wondering what I do for self care. I found my passion in an unlikely place. See, I suffer from chronic pain. This means I often feel like I can’t move because it’s too painful. However, one day, I decided that it was incredibly important for me to do a 5K. I wanted to prove to myself that I could. That 5k turned into countless others since then. In fact, just this year I have participated in 3. When I am running, it’s just me and that voice inside of me telling me to quit (to which I promptly tell her to step aside because I’ve got this!) I have also found that fitness in general is my passion, specifically plus size fitness, because I love being able to feel strong. It helps me with my inner strength as well as my outer. I love to inspire others to make time for themselves in this way, too.
Something I always do after a race is enjoy a victory dance and a glass of wine. I really love Wente wines because their love of the journey has inspired me to keep making time for myself. They have been around for 5 generations of wine making and they continue to strive for better quality with their amazing selection of wines (my personal favorite is this Morning Fog because I am a huge fan of white wines and Chardonnay). Wente wines also has a summer concert series featuring some of my favorite artists encouraging us to make time for music. Music has always been a huge part of my life and certain songs can really take you back to a better time when you are feeling stressed out and need a reminder to make time for yourself. If you need a little help making yourself a priority, here are my tips for making time for yourself.
Tips for Making Time for Yourself
Find a hobby to stick with– Hobbies are a great way to make time for ourselves. Make sure you find one you can afford to do as well as enjoy. And don’t be afraid to go outside your comfort zone. I wasn’t even feeling the idea of working out as a passion at first. Now, I get excited every time my feet hit the floor for a workout. Try things you haven’t until you find something you can be passionate about that’s just for you.
Schedule time for yourself– With our busy lives, we often need to schedule things, Scheduling in time for yourself should be just as much of a priority as that dentist appointment for your kid or a dinner date with your husband. You don’t need to schedule in something every single day, but I recommend at least once a week. It doesn’t even have to be long. Maybe your passion is yoga. Schedule in 20 minutes if that’s all you can do.
Make sure you can relax and unwind sometimes– Sure, time for yourself could mean doing something exciting you have always wanted to do, but you should also give your mind and body time to relax. I sometimes just find sipping a glass of wine at sunset to be the perfect way to spend ‘me time’. Check out Wente Wine selections for some inspiration. (May I just say the price is right here, too? I got my bottle for less than $20.)
Change up your routine if you need to– If it seems like you won’t have time to schedule something in for yourself, try to see where your time may be going that it doesn’t need to. Are you spending time on Facebook? You probably have time for yourself to unplug, then. You could also try getting up earlier in the day. I love the quiet of the morning for a good run or workout.
I can’t stress enough how important prioritizing yourself is. And in case you need one last reminder, it is not selfish, moms of the world.